Tuesday, October 9, 2012

Out of Sorts or Discombobulated

I am so discombobulated (wow I did spell check on that and it was there...I just thought it was a made up word.  Like ishkabibale, weepwoop, itsyabeannie and bobaleany.)  Anyhow I've been out of sorts the last several days.  I was doing so good for a few weeks.  I was in rhythm, things seemed to be working out but not sure why, because the extra things I were doing were not leading to anything.  Upon inspection, which I probably shouldn't of done, what I was doing seemed like nothing more than time filling busy work.  Maybe the true benefit of it was to give my mind something else to focus on.

My problem, and I don't think it is a problem, is I  like to know that what I'm doing is productive.  I don't like to walk around in a circle.  So when I feel like I'm walking in a circle, I feel compelled to stop and evaluate.  So when I did evaluate last week I kind of came to a dead stop and haven't been able to overcome my dead weight inertia ( I think that is the right use, if I recall my physics).  Today, I was supposed to work out, and make cold calls.  I did neither.  I allowed myself to be sucked into the vortex of my office doing other things, things that I didn't want to do.  I never cut out time to do the things I wanted to do.  And it isn't like the things I did were any more productive, or wouldn't of gotten done...but I just didn't muster up the motivation to do the other stuff.

Why isn't there a clear path to travel on?  Damn you uncertainties of life, DAMN YOU!

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